So why aren’t you totally in love with life right now?
I could answer that in one sentence but that would be a really short article and you wouldn’t believe me anyway.
Life is a strange thing. When we are young we can’t wait to grow up, to be in charge of our own destiny, to not be told when to go to bed or whether or not we can have some sweets. We long for the day we have our own income, get our first car or house; the day we gain true independence.
And then as we slowly get all those privileges, we start wishing for a time where life was less complicated, a time where we don’t have to make all the decisions, that we don’t have to go to work every single day to pay the bills and not to have a house cluttered with the detritus of modern-day family life…oh to be a child once again!
And as we become less content with our own lives, we start to look at other people’s lives and comparing ourselves unfavourably to them; What are they doing? Are they happy? Why are they happy? What’s their secret? What am I doing wrong? Why can’t I be like that?
Then we move to explaining exactly why your life isn’t ‘as good as theirs.’ Well they have more money. They don’t have three kids at home. They don’t have a huge mortgage. They obviously came into a large inheritance/won the lottery. They got the ‘slim gene.’
And your reasons for not being totally in love with your life get written into your mind as easy as slipping a hot knife through butter.
The solution is simple……If you want to stop feeling dissatisfied with your life you need to get grateful what’s in your life and stop comparing it to someone else’s.
The truth is their life is never going to be all that it seems to you anyway, and if you want that person’s life, you better be prepared to get ALL of it! That woman you see walking confidently down the street in gorgeous clothes? She may be in a deeply unhappy marriage, completely estranged from her family and cries herself to sleep every night. Buying clothes is the only way she can feel good about herself.
That successful business woman you see each month at networking telling people how busy she is and how she just loves her life? She’s so busy she hasn’t slept properly for six months, forgets to eat, hardly sees her partner, is highly stressed and anxious and is about to hit burn-out. All she wants to do is fly away somewhere and shut the world out but she can’t because she terrified of what might happen.
Every evening think back over the day and list at least 5 things that you are grateful for in your life. It’s something I do with my partner when we get into bed and before we go to sleep. You can do it in your head, you can write it down – whatever works for you, but make you do it.
If you find yourself comparing your life unfavourably to some else’s, stop! Comparing unfavourably and modelling someone are two different things. One not only keeps you stuck, but actively makes you feel bad, the other encourages you to make change and live your life how you want to.
So please stop comparing yourself to someone else. It won’t help you, it won’t make your life better and it won’t allow you to be totally in love with your own magical, precious, privileged life.
Be grateful for every thing in your life now and everything that’s coming to you in the future.